I. We're almost there
Two years of slogging all down to a dozen or so papers.
A dozen or so papers all down to one result slip.
One result slip - a passport to a million possibilities in life.
A million possibilities in life, but only one path to choose.
Sometimes i just wish i had 9 lives to live so that I'll still have 1 extra chance to make the right choice after screwing up the previous 8 ones.
II. A bright spot in the midst of dreary gloom
Went out with phaive-eh on fri after a rather worrying econs paper 1. It was a tiring but certainly fulfilling night for the mind, soul, and especially the tummy (: Ate delicious japanese curry at liang court and then ambled around the singapore river while doing retarded stuff (: Den had a nice chat with boiboi on the way home. One of the most purrrfect nights i've had in weeks.
Went out again for lunch after physics paper 3. Haha whoops i felt quite bad for making everyone walk so far but i hope the nice food made up for it! This goes to show that you shouldn't place your entire faith in streetdirectory.com. But then again, i would have been a clueless, stranded tourist if not for that.
III. Compassion
When deep-seated hurts become physically visible, there is always
You can: kick it, punch it, squeeze it, hug it, trample on it, scream at it, dress it up (or down). But above all, love it as a child loves his soft toys. That's the only thing that sustains it's warmness and ensures that the harsh and arbitrary passage of time does not wear it out.
IV. Fitting the puzzle pieces together
And there we stood,
An arm's length apart,
Feet firmly rooted to the ground,
Just barely out of each other's embrace.
Oh, but pardon those beguiling eyes,
For it had the mark of a mona lisa smile,
Introspectively peering on with an intent, fixated gaze.
An angel's innocence with a devil's stony stare.
So temptingly dear but yet so strikingly bare.
In your left hand, a dangling carrot swung.
Hypnotically, enticingly - like the hand of a grandfather's clock,
It ticked time away, steadily and ever so surely.
Most damningly, I yearned for it.
But thankfully, there was this mask of veneer (and also that calm whisper).
That, indeed, was the sorry suspect of my intuition.
Still, my limbs were numb.
Each trembling ripple through the body masked a soul in resounding fits.
I was weak,
but it was weakness that drove my resolve.
__________
Hasty contemplation and an iron will beat down that surge of fervency into submission.
It was painfully fulfilling to exercise such self-restraint and to eventually succeed.
With new found hope, I drew a line between our toes,
Marking one side as 'wrong', and the other - the side 'less wrong'.
I'll never know which side i'm on,
Until the day where a good samaritan passes by,
And bends down to wash out that divide.
A carrot and stick approach
Monday, November 16, 2009
Too long and too little but too bad.
Friday, November 13, 2009I. Jumbled thoughts of a forgotten past
- An outpouring of love so great that tears welled up in his eyes.
- It is so peacefully sad how certain things can just slide out of your life unnoticed.
- A dormant exterior with an exploding interior.
- A passing calm before the storm.
- Seeing them fall from firm foundations. Indeed, I have the capacity and potential to just do that. But then again i believe that in the end their wrong will be made right.
- Chilling serenity.
II. Problems then and now
My moral fibre has rended again.
I can't make a judgement call,
For who am I to judge at all?
Somehow, this steadfastness has leaked from my soul.
It came strongly, but left eerily softly.
Ignorance on my part perhaps?
But then I saw you again.
And as I often do, I asked myself,
How can you always stay that strong?
I have tried to emulate your strength,
But I am not you, nor will I ever be.
So then,
What's wrong with taking the middle ground?
What's wrong with manipulating someone towards a good end?
Arguably, doing so has an element of respect and patience (alongside much love).
Moreover, an explicit expression of good intentions may just cut people up even worse.
Still,
The means don't justify the ends.
And once again,
it harks back to the same old question,
Who am i to judge which way is better?
On a more positive note,
This inner turbulence is indicative of change - change for the better.
But why must I be so sure of it?
Why should I look upon the world with those rose-tinted glasses?
They only make me momentarily optimistic but blind me from the cold, hard truth.
Perhaps all I can do now is to pray harder and wait quietly.
Please, I really do need a moment of peace,
So that I can discern between his voice and my own noise.
On a final note, I am really thankful for this.
But woe to me on the day that he tells me that i am finally mature enough.
III. Tranquility
It seemed so edifying to stream alongside the singapore river while rain poured down from the sky.
The scenery was bare - bleak. grey. solemn.
Lonesome indeed; because my surroundings were lacking the usual hustle and bustle one would expect of a CBD.
Towering skyscrapers filled the background. They stood tall, but nonetheless remained as dark, insignificant silhouettes subservient to the sky's fury.
As i trudged on, a small boat came into view. It chugged along beneath the bridge, going past me without so much as a smile.
Despite being void of people, the boat remained ignorant; unfeeling towards its own sorrowful solitude (but it had always been that way).
Puddles of water were littered all over the concrete pavement.
The steady pitter-patter of the rain nursed them into life as they grew from small puddles into larger pools of water.
Interestingly, dragging my feet into them felt chillingly fresh. Waves of coldness jolted through my body and shocked my mind out of its seemingly aimless state.
In front of me, a couple of people leaned against the marble wall and puffed away nonchalantly.
It seemed uncouth and uncaring, almost vulgar.
Still, it reeked of absolute coolness.
And it suddenly dawned upon me that being cool often mitigated against life's miseries and hardships. sigh.
I crossed the bridge.
Before me, people were sitting under the protective cover of the museum's porch.
Gloomy, impatient, bored. Some visibly crest-fallen too.
'Why not come and play under the rain? You know, it can wash away sadness and despair!"
Well, screw that naivety. Utter brainlessness and immaturity.
And there before me was this curtain of water gushing down the side of the building.
Ha, an unexpected urban waterfall in the unlikeliest of places.
For a moment, it seemed to augur change in utter lifelessness and desolation.
But that was just wishful thinking.
Beneath the walls of the building lay a safe haven free from the stingingly chilly rain.
And after expressing my gratitude for such marvelous creations, I finally stepped inside.
Behind me, the sun peeked out from the swarm of angry clouds, as if ushering in a new spring.
Then, I spoke to her.
She handed me the goods,
And my melancholy faded as I glanced through its contents.
IV. Confused and lost
Weary headbanging.
Thud thud thud it goes,
As the heart beats out of sync,
And the mind wonders what the hell is going on.
Ich werde in die Tannen gehen
Dahin wo ich sie zuletzt gesehen
Doch der Abend wirft ein Tuch aufs Land
und auf die Wege hinterm Waldesrand
Und der Wald er steht so schwarz und leer
Weh mir, oh weh
Und die Vögel singen nicht mehr
More videos!
Thursday, October 18, 2007I have finally tagged all my posts! Took quite a long time but it's quite fulfilling (= Now it'll be much easier to find posts, and also helps navigation when I move into the new blogger.
Today, I'll be showing 2 more videos hahaha xD First one up...showcasing two very imba Soul Calibre players! This video was secretly taken at the Rosyth Chalet in September 2007 (ok fine, it wasn't really that secret...) Check out the moves man, i bet you can't do em xD
Next, a random video of chem lesson with Koh Siak Peng, whom everyone loves...a lot hahaha xD Now let's do a little introduction. What you see here is perfectly safe to do at home, even for kids aged below 1. There are no dangerous parts that little kids may swallow, and no animals were involved in this experiment. It is just an interesting way to experience hot, sexy stuff (no humans involved too so stop thinking crooked!), so you should try it out at home, or your neighbour's kitchen if you would like to.
It is easy to set up, and can be done over and over again without much fuss. Get this toy today at $9.99 at your nearest convenience store! Limited offer only while stocks last!
*Disclaimer: do not believe me! (=
By the way, school day are restful days nowadays. I spent my time wisely catching up on the lost hours meant for sleeping xD hahaha
ICC Homies
Wednesday, October 17, 2007I'll start posting videos, as promised, one at a time on a daily basis, so do check them out! (=
Today's video will feature a group of talented gangsta rappers. These true-to-their-groove homies will be moving to the beat, heads bobbing and all. They are immensely popular in the club, and are also renowned for their complicated syncopations and polyrhythms...which you can see from this video xD
Much has been said, so now it's show time...enjoy!
Quite pro eh hahaha (by the way please excuse the background laughter). And that'll be all for today, check back some other day for other videos (=
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Back to my diary...
I have finally uploaded the pictures from my phone to flickr (= I'll be uploading some videos soon (you must really watch these exclusive videos! However, do note that they are not for the faint-hearted...whee!)
So now it's back to blogging about school life (it's quite interesting actually xD)...for a while...oh yeah and I'll finally be moving to the new blogger quite soon! And also add labels to all older posts at the same time (=
By the way I will use smaller sized pictures from now on too to save on the web page's loading time...you can access the bigger sized pictures by clicking on those that are posted on this blog
Recent happenings in 4Q:
Tortor Leong stars in Balls of Fury! Try to spot him in the movie (=
Dadaaboi & dadaabgal. Shh they are quite shy, so better not disturb the chemistry xD
Lye Yu Min's cool makeover! Check out that hair homie....
Koh Siak Peng chem lessons! <333
Borat is actaully Tan Yong Kiam in disguise!!!! *faints*
New class delicacy: Poppycock! (Okay fine we don't really eat it but don't you just love the name xD)
Seetoh and his mission to recycle plastic bags! (and I'm serious about this hahaha)
And during the slacker times in the project room...
Practising how to stack trophies! (It's hard mind you xD)
And I've succeeded in the next level of "learning-how-to-stack-trophies-in-the-project-room" project
Oh yes and not forgetting our new class mascot...UNCLE SAM!!!! (=
Uncle Sam comes in all shapes and sizes. As you can see, he is right now in his water form on our classroom floor. Soon, he'll evaporate and appear somewhere else (And we all love him too, very very much!)
Now, here he is...partially formed xD
Recent happenings in Infocomm Club:
One will never feel the joy of pinching Feng's cheeks just by looking at this picture. So, go find him in school and do what you see in this picture (=
The words read, "Malvine..."; apparently Aileen Chor thinks Melvin should be spelt as Malvine (no harm intended, we all really respect this fine old lady, ya really i'm very serious!)
We like the word "LOL" so much that we've set up this LOL corner in the com lab (now reader, start saying LOL! You can ROFL also if you like...)
Recent happenings in Raffles Voices:
Ms Yew's Birthday! (Although it was quite long ago whooops)
Group photo!
Left to right: Ms Chiang, Ms Yew
Cutting the cake (=
Recent happenings in MEP:
Arts at the atrium performance by renowned violin prodigies!!! (= Their hands just move so fast...
We appreciate art apart from music too...
A very eye-catching piece of art work made with sweets during lesson!
Recent Happenings elsewhere:
Rosyth Chalet during September holidays!!!
It was a time of reunion...and gambling xD (we are all poor people so money wasn't involved, don't worry!)
Reliving past memories (=
Hardworking people mugging on a Sunday morning during cell?!
It was a power-packed study session really!
And...Joel Tang's Birthday! (He's the guy in the above picture)
Right before he got dunked xD
Wow, check out this man (=
Coolio car! Even cooler number plate!
And more interesting sightings at home...
A green baby bird was spotted trying to fly
The nest was right outside our door (=
Isn't he (or she or it or whatever) adorable haha (it looks really cute in real life)
Okay, so that's about it! Time to sleep...there's school tomorrow and Chinese Os coming up argh =(
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Movies and more (=
Sunday, October 14, 20072nd season of Goong (Princess Hours) has just started airing yesterday! (13/10/07) Although I don't really like watching dramas, this one was different...season 1 that is...not sure whether this season's episodes will be just as good.
Official website for Goong can be found here (in korean).
Season 1's details can be found here. The site includes the synopsis, characters, and filming locations.
Season 2's details can be found here. It is a fan website.
Casting for Season 2 (from goong2.net):
Lee Hoo starring Se7en
His blood flows in a Royal family, but Lee Hoo doesn’t know it. Not knowing that he’s a prince, he works at a Chinese Restaurant as a delivery boy…delivering food in the palace. He looks at everything in a positive aspect and is an optimist by nature. Though he’s in poverty (poor), he lives every day freely…but one day, something happens and it’s the start of his life as a royal.
Yang Soon-Ae starring Huh Lee-Jae
Everyone in the neighborhood knows Soon-Ae as an impracticable girl. She thinks preciously of her fraternal twin. But one day, she finds out that Lee Hoo is the boy that she grew up with as a child, and they start their life’s together in the palace.
Lee Joon starring Kang Doo
To become a prince, he recieved training as a mastery elite. He’s a great candidate. Lee Hoo’s appearance makes Lee Joon get farther away from becoming a prince. He’s a perfectionist.
Shin Sae-Ryung starring Park Shin-Hye
Honor and power, Sae-Ryung grew up in a wealthy family. She has never lost first place/spot at school (meaning she’s very smart)…she has skills and the looks of becoming prince’s wife. She always had the ambition of becoming a royal princess. However, the prince that she has always imagined of is completely different when she see’s Lee Hoo’s sudden appearance. A change comes to her way.
The cast has changed =( Although the characters won't look as nice anymore (in my opinion)...hopefully the storyline will be just as great as it was in season 1.
Some recommendations for websites that allow one to watch movies and tv shows online (I think most people know about it but well I'll just list them here yeah)...
Movie6.net : Find all the latest movies here (Including Resident Evil)
Crunchyroll.com: Mostly anime and drama episodes, game trailers, and so on (its database of shows is HUGE)...
Veoh.com: Includes a lot of videos posted by people (just like youtube). Can find movies as well as other stuff like Justice League Unlimited episodes etc. The website also includes a client that can be downloaded to access the online shows, subscriptions to series of shows, a search engine and so on (more can be found here).
For a full list of online video streaming services (including other services like blip.tv and youtube), check out this PCworld review: "Video Sharing Shoot-Out", which ranks all the different services.
I'd recommend veoh because of the downloadable client (= It saves a lot of trouble looking for videos in an internet browser. And it downloads full seasons in the background...that means playing games while it helps me download all the episodes of "the zeta project", a new cartoon I'm watching now hahaha xD
Yeah, so now's the time to watch many many shows and movies to catch up with whateva that's been happening; I've been drifting away for too long already, so must enjoy while I still can (=
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i'm back (=
Sunday, September 02, 2007Things just weeks ago seem decades away. Somehow I’m lost, wonderin why time has passed so fast; and then another term is gone again.
Now seems just like any other holiday, where I take a step back, and get rdy for another ten million-billion-gazilion steps ahead. Hope my life doesnt end in such a flash too :/
But at least there are still many fond memories (= k enough with the emoness i shall do with wdv lil time there is...
oh man i dun know where to start, argh k here goes
Silicon Valley Trip with ICC, last 2 weeks of June (= Haha I still the fun times, esp at the themeparks with anlin, harisan, stefanus, n zewei; the midnite pizzas, games, and flippin thru TV xD n all the friends, as well as the learning trips.
Well, at least I still rmbr abt it... (=
Visit to Stanford Uni
Visit to Adobe
Visit to Google
Visit to UCLA
k so there u hve it; ahh the wonder of pictures, i now rmbr andre chasin the gals (the result is obvious) xD HAHA, my roomates zewei, harisan, n randy, n all the fun we had at nite xD oh yes n all the childish nonsensical stuff (benjamin explainin 69 on the bus xD), weijie n gang, stefanus n jiahui on the plane, yy (her chicken n her aunt n grandma)...our presentation at NUS ovrseas college with jiaqi n zewe. lol the bits and pieces keep poppin up, n tt's a gd thing (= apologies if dis may seem absolutely incoherent :/
Inter-Musical Group Soccer!!!! I dno when it'll ever come but yes man we nid to play tgthr aftr 4 yrs of bein in musical groups
postr for inter-mg soccer (=
ohyes, our cell on sunday aftr sendin off abi at the break of dawn (haha i know it looks damn fake...cuz it is xD)
i think dis was on mafti day whn we got punished; 4Q!! (=
whee HI, nu idea when i did dis but it looks like fun (=
Hullett's submission for the poster design round of the interhouse infocomm challenge (= dno wad the result is, but we got ovrall 3rd (final house standings), nt bad la...considerin the extreme lack of talent in our sec 4 batch xD
oh THIS (= our russian package for hist! it was exhaustin but everyone was proud of the end product: a sickle with a hidden scroll in it, and a vodka bottle with another hidden scroll in it, hahaha (=
SLUMSHADY!!!! Our vry own ICC sec 4 batch album...comin soon
Porgy & Bess concert (= hahaha, it sure was great FUN with the lil kids (both watchin them n performin with them).
Recounting....(lights go off in the toilet filled with lil boys n our rv ppl)...yishu: eh i grab ur pe***!!!! HAHAHAHA xD
oh yea n prof wei is damn freakin pro omgomgomg :/ haha n i'm addictd to one part of the song now...ohnoes
SMILE yifan! (=
ah okk....frm left: ACS(J) conductor, our two soloists, and prof wei (=
Nu idea when i took dis too xD
My kangaroo + j neo's softball cap = houyes (= 4Q rocks hahaha
we got bored during one FPS trng...it was a tiring experience, 2 hrs of hardcore writing every wednesday or so for 6+ mnths. there was a lot of obstacles along the way (like a total lack of focus every RE lesson xD), but at least we were all able to seriously hardcore durin the wk b4 the comp n produced a decent booklet durin the qualifyin round (= still awaitin results...
Agong's grp (last yr's FPS grp); thnx for all the help man u guys r damn pro (=
Eng biography presentation (= hahaha TYK's grp erm...praying? it was another hardcore but fun experience
n of course, how cld they eva forget dis...haha it was funny man, but well done xD
N dis is our grp's final product: the cover of our eng biography (= haha hope ng yi sheng likes it (we mailed 1 copy to him to thnk him for bein our interviewee) Haha see the guy under the spotlighy...Dadaab drew it, n it's BLACK xD
the new warheads sweet (or liquid thingy) we found @ 7-11, it's freakin sour (= houyes, this one belongs to ajay who has been keepin it in his pencil box for a couple of months xD
other purpose of warheads apart frm keepin one awake durin lesson (=
k i hve NO IDEA absolutely...but it's related to RV (=
OTHER purposes of sweets HAHAHAH xD dis time it was skittles with a kangaroo durin MEP, n kammermusik No. 7 in the background! (=
OUCH xiao ming!!! xD 4Q durin chem lesson (= n tt's my desk partner hah
TYK's pocket is dam nice n warm la xD
aiyah see how stressful RI life is, even the red pen goes crazy xD hahaha some random script i saw lying arnd hehe
Zhuan ti zuo ye 2007!!! Argh omg; chinese can kill, esp when it's in fan ti :/ but the whole thing was quite cool (=
LYM + jayjay on the floor...4Q seriously rocks man (=
k fine 4T is messed up too (n tt's NOT mine plus it's a fake HAHAHAHAH xD but looks damn real man...)
R-AGE D&D! (= k la nt bad (from left: nelson, zee, tatwai, me, josh, hoho)
oh yes, and josie xD hahaha wad is he doin there man when he shldve been in the pic above hahahaha
Exchange with Trinity College Choir! They sang raindrops keep fallin on my head dam nicely (= oh yes, n of course, MOMOLAMONSTER xD hahahahahahahaha, it was the paris hilton lookalike lol (= we had fun tgther, n yea their tenors are freakin imba; plus i got a free voice masterclass houyes!
Inter-primary Infocomm Challenge!!!! hahaha, oh man i bet we all looked like tt in pri skl xD
N there's ITMAP, another music comp. it was a rly fun experience xD hahaha (e.g. playin marvel vs capcom durin prac xD n writing "charles = stupid" + drawin a scrwd up scale on the whiteboard). the practices were great man, n although we got 5th, we knew we didnt need to spend a single cent on external expertise (= btw thnx to the tchrs for the treat @ seoul garden, it was FUN hahahaha
oh n not forgettin the grp itself (gabby tan our leadr [GABBY!!! hehe], lamb, ta, linan, dng, yannie, n me) (= yeah baby! I'll post pics when i get them
somemore still! piano masterclass <-- i m dam glad i didnt back down; it was thru dis tt i startd to realise tt there was so much more to piano playin...n now at least i've understood hw i've gone wrong durin prac n so on, very timely considerin dip exam is comin DAMN SOON! argh
more music stuff....ah of course, i rmbr writin handbell scores for dr. fong (= it was quite hard work, but at least it paid off la, now i can get $$$ hehehe xD
oh yeah man, nt forgettin ICC n our core cca proposal! dis must go thru man! it'll b a milestone in the club's hist so we'll do wdv we can since it's our vry last yr (for sec 4s yeh we're doin dis thing as a batch houyes) (=
of course there's much more (= but yeh dis is wad i can rmbr as of now. n to all RI ppl: gd luck for EOYS, i know the system is dam scrwd up but wad to do....n also to those takin Os: more gd luck!! (= haha oh man dis sounds so much like everythin is comin to an end...yeh it's kinda true la, but at least still got more perf n comps till nov when i can finally bow out of sec skl :/ aii it feels great n sad at the same time...
so yeah, till the nxt time i hve time hahahah (= but i think there will b cuz it's gna b DMP rly soon YEA!!! yup, tt's all frm me for now, gta go slp...
Alive
Monday, August 27, 2007Yes my blog lives!!! After a long break I'm finally back (= dun wry it'll b a long post, there are just so many things to talk abt...
coming soon... xD
